Category Archives: Humor

The bath and the bucket

A party of suppliers was being given a tour of a mental hospital.

One of the visitors had made some very insulting remarks about the patients.

After the tour the visitors were introduced to various members of staff in the canteen.

The rude visitor chatted to one of the security staff, Bill, a kindly and wise ex-policeman.

“Are they all raving loonies in here then?” said the rude man.

“Only the ones who fail the test,” said Bill.

“What’s the test?” said the man.

“Well, we show them a bath full of water, a bucket, a jug and an egg-cup, and we ask them what’s the quickest way to empty the bath,” said Bill.

“Oh I see, simple – the normal ones know it’s the bucket, right?”

“No actually,” said Bill, “The normal ones say pull out the plug. Should I check when there’s a bed free for you?”

The Hearing Aid

An old lady had a hearing-aid fitted, hidden underneath her hair.
A week later she returned to the doctor for her check-up.
“It’s wonderful – I can hear everything now,” she reported very happily to the doctor.
“And is your family pleased too?” asked the doctor.
“Oh I haven’t told them yet,” said the old lady, “And I’ve changed my will twice already..”